This Satan Guy
by Marika Webster
Summary: Heero leaned back in his chair and stared at the other boy, the details finally clicking in his brain. These were terms he understood. Chapter 2 now added!
1. Dorothy is Satan

Tensei's Notes:  * laughs maniacally *  'Rika-san… is a genius.  Peeps, this is what happens when you give Tensei a cell phone, which means free long distance.  XD  'Rika-san is one of my best, and closest friends, and I look up to her as a big sister.  We've been through a whole lot, and decided to write a tad bit about it.  Enjoy!  * HuGz minna *

 Marika's Notes: This story is completely a work of fiction… or is it? ::grins:: Okies so enjoy. And Tensei-san… YOU! 

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This Satan Being 

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Violet eyes twitched in silent discomfort as Duo Maxwell stared at his friend. The stoic pilot of 01 stared right back, unflinching in his determination for answers. "I'm serious. I need to know." 

"Well." Duo sighed and leaned back in his seat, carelessly sipping his coffee and setting the mug back on the table with a soft click.  "What is it that you want to know?  I mean, there's a lot of stuff out there.  Do you want to know anything in specific?"

There was a momentary silence as Heero deposited the Bible on the table with a thunk. "I need to know it all. I found this part about Satan attacking people." As usual he fell silent and slid into a seat across from Duo, waiting for an answer.  He merely stared, waiting for an answer from the one pilot he could usually count on never to shut up.

Duo nodded knowingly and pulled the Bible in front of him, flipping through the pages.  "Mmmhmm.  Lemme guess.  The thought of some evil, supernatural being that cannot be destroyed with a bullet or a beam cannon scares the hell out of you, huh?"

"I do NOT get scared." Heero cast a withering glance of non-expression to Duo and reached for the Bible. "If you don't want to explain it, I can always ask Quatre. I'm sure he'd know." His fingers curled possessively around the cover of the tattered Gideon bible he'd found in the current safe house they were occupying.

"Come on, Heero.  You know that Quatre's Muslim.  He's probably never cracked a Bible before.  Besides, I'm more than willing to explain it.  I didn't mean to offend you, but it's fine to admit that you're afraid once in a while." He reached his arms behind his head and tossed a leg over the tabletop, getting comfortable for what he predicted could be a long conversation.  "Anyway, the great thing about this is that you don't have to be afraid.  See, Satan can only attack us with such things as fear, discouragement, and the like, and he can't do anything that God can't protect us from."

Heero's brow furrowed in a rare betrayal of his confusion. "Fear and discouragement. I don't understand. If he's supernatural shouldn't he capable of manipulating the physical senses so that you fall prey to him?"

He did not pause but continued. "And what if a person takes refuge in this God of yours. What's the purpose of doing battle if the outcome is already predicted? It is not logical." Heero stubbornly crossed his arms over his chest.

"Ever heard the saying, 'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger?'  He can mess with your mind and your surroundings all he wants, but when it all comes down, it's God.  He won't let Satan get to you.  Like, check this guy out." He reached forward and wrenched the large book from the other man's grasp and flipped through the pages as he continued.  

"This guy named Job.  His life, well… sucked.  But he was always fine, because he kept his sights set on God.  He went through a lot of crap, but check this out, God made Satan leave HIM alone.

"The Lord said to Satan, "Very well, then, everything he has is in your hands, but on the man himself do not lay a finger."

He closed the book and shrugged slightly, "He let Satan toy with everything that Job had, but only knowing that Satan would lose anyway."

There was a marked frown as Heero stared at the book and noted the length of the pages that Duo held gathered in one hand. "I still don't understand. This Satan person is as tricky as OZ. I don't like him. And I still don't comprehend it. How can he know what to attack?" His agitation was becoming more transparent as he repeated himself.

Duo sighed, fearing that he could never convince his so logical comrade of such supernatural beings.  But he would do his best and tell it like he knew.  "Alright, Heero.  Remember the Zero system?  How it linked directly to your brain?"  A hesitant nod from the other pilot prompted him to continue.  "Zero knew what you were thinking, just like Satan can.  He can read your thoughts, your hopes, your soul, but he can't touch you.  He can only observe, and use what knowledge he can gather and what little power he has to fight you.  Not you, but your soul."

There was a long moment of silence that stretched into an uncomfortable minute as Heero considered this. His words were faltering. "So, the Zero system, since it wasn't able to control my movements, only manipulate my thoughts that made it my enemy?" There was another frown, this one deeper. "That does not make sense Duo. I'm beginning to think you're making this up as you go along."

Duo shook his head quickly.  "No, no, Heero!  Listen, for one thing, I could not have possibly made all of this up, I mean, for one thing, look at the size of this book!" He emphasized his point by lifting the book up, and letting it go, allowing it to slam back down with a loud thump.  "Do you honestly think that I'd have time enough to write that between all of our missions?  Besides, this is complex stuff, and you of all people should know that my brain could not possibly conjure up something like this. So, will you at least just hear me out?  You asked a question, I'm just trying to answer it." 

Prussian eyes stared at the braided pilot as though attempting to gauge the validity of his argument. Duo didn't lie, that was a given, and therefore what Duo said must be true. It was a simple enough equation to make, though it could be filled with holes in a heartbeats time if Heero thought about it long enough, such as Duo didn't lie, and Duo believed this, therefore it was what he believed to be the truth, but that didn't make it truth. Let alone make it this absolute Truth that the American was currently arguing. Heero waved a tolerant hand, his decision made. "Go ahead."

"When Jesus ascended shortly after His resurrection, He told his disciples that He would be back soon.  Now, He kinda left out the part where he would have told them HOW soon.  That was thousands of years ago, but in eternity, the time runs a bit differently than it does here.

"See," violet eyes fixed on the Prussian, determined to get the point across to Heero that he was absolutely serious, "Satan rules this world.  Ever since sin entered into this world, Satan has been running amok, doing whatever he wants to.  This whole planet is his playground, no – more like hunting ground, because he's also preying on Christians, trying to weaken God's army before He comes back."

The frown eased a bit as Heero began grasping the concept he'd now been struggling with for a full 10 minutes, a rare thing. And even more rare was the hesitant smile that began to form on his face. His speech was slow as he attempted to vocalize his thoughts. "It's... like... a war. Right? Like Oz against us." He gazed at Duo, perturbed. "I think I understand it a little now."

Duo's trademark grin returned, and his mood immediately lightened.  "Exactly!" he exclaimed, feeling as if a heavy weight had been lifted from his shoulders.  He finally had something to bridge the gap.  "It's like this:

"Remember that time when we were trying to get into Libra, but there were swarms of mobile dolls fighting us off, that time when Dorothy was controlling them with Zero?  Remember how she finally figured to focus on destroying Quatre first?  That was because she found out that he was our leader, and one of the strongest among us.  She figured that if she could destroy, or at least disable Quatre, that the rest of us would fall apart.

"That's exactly how Satan works.  Sure, he's not too happy about the Christians that pester him, but it's the ones that hold the others together and prove to be strong soldiers for God's army that he wants to disable, so he attacks them with everything that he's got."

Heero leaned back in his chair and stared at the other boy, the details finally clicking in his brain. These were terms he understood. "So, Dorothy is Satan. I understand now." He gave a curt nod and rose from his chair, lifting the Bible from Duo's grasp and cradling it to his chest. "I need to do some research on this Jesus person." 

He bestowed a small smile upon Duo, not really caring when he heard a curious voice questioning over his shoulder. "What's going on?"

Quatre stood in the doorway, his normally placid face lit with something akin to amusement. Heero gave the blonde Arabian a full-blown grin. "Duo was just telling how Dorothy was Satan." Heero's smile disappeared abruptly. "I have half this book left, if I want to finish tonight I'd better get started."

  
  
"Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today."


	2. The Trouble with Pancakes

Bekki's Notes:  We… are… evil.  XD  This is what happens when you put Bekki Lou and Marika Webster in the same building together for a week.  Beware… * creepy music plays in the background *

Marika's Notes: * blank stare *  Is it my turn to say something?  Um… enjoy reading?  * back away from Bekki… slowly *

A general note: This is not meant to defame in any way anyone's religious beliefs. However the authors ARE Christians and fully believe in the seriousness of this story. This chapter was more like a little stress relief than anything else. I promise this is not making fun of anything in anyway. - Bekki Lou and Marika Webster 

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This Satan Guy

Chapter Two

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Quatre looked at Duo, then to Heero, and back again.  "Um…"  He debated on whether or not to run for his life.  Heero was carrying a bible and Dorothy was Satan?  Well, he could agree with the last one, but it wasn't every day that you saw Heero carrying a Bible.  His gaze finally rested on Duo and he shook his head.  "Duo… what did you do to him?"

Violet eyes gazed at him without blinking. "He came to me with a question about Satan, so I answered him." His hands were folded neatly in his lap as though he hadn't just used the words Heero and Satan in the same sentence.   
  


Quatre stared at him blankly, then blinked. 

"Quatre, you look like you've seen a ghost!  Come on, what's with the weird eyes?"  Duo just grinned and leaned back in his chair.  "Don't tell me that you're going weirdo on me."

"I'm not, I just… Heero?  And a bible?  It just…  I'd sooner believe that Wufei painted Shenlong pink!"

Duo sat straight up and stared at his friend. "You know. I thought that you of all people would have an open mind. Everyone searches for something eventually. And if Heero can find the Truth, that's all the better. God forbid my friends end up burning in hell, or purgatory, that's even worse."

Quatre shook his head and sighed.  "I don't know, Duo.  Heero can believe what he wants to but you know that I have my own beliefs.  Don't try to pass yours on to me, just make sure that Heero doesn't get out of hand with this."

Duo shrugged.  "Heero?  Out of hand?  Yeah right!"

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"Deep and wide!  DEEP and WIDE!  There's a fountain flowing deep and wide!!!"

"What in the world is that?!"  Quatre shot out of bed and ran to the hall. Only to be greeted with a gruesome sight.

Heero stood in the hallway, obviously having come just then out of the shower. He trotted down the hallway with a towel dangling precariously from one hand as he belted out the tune yet again. 

Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, Quatre wondered if he was having a nightmare.  'I knew I shouldn't have eaten those day old tacos for a late night snack.'  Deciding that there would be no harm in getting on the nerves of dream-Heero, he marched up to the singing man and tapped him on the shoulder.  "Excuse me, Heero, but would you mind being a little quiet?  I'm trying to sleep here."

"Sleep?  Sleep?!  Who can sleep when there's good news to be shared!  His love is DEEP and WIDE!  DEEP and WIDE!!!"

Quatre groaned and stomped into his bedroom, slamming the door behind him.  'A dream… it's all just a dream.  I'll go to sleep, and when I wake up, everything will be normal again.'

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Quatre whistled a tune to himself as he skipped down the stairs, unaware that it was the same tune as the one that haunted his dreams – no matter, after all, it was only a dream.  He stepped into the kitchen and his eyes went wide. 

Heero jumped in front of him with a plate of… something.  "Hey, Quatre!  Want some cross-shaped pancakes?  It even has little chocolate chips, to remind us of the sins that the cross took with it!"

"Cr…Cross-shaped pancakes? Heero, you don't cook. And you certainly don't make cross-shaped pancakes. What is wrong with you?" Quatre blinked and moved around his friend mind set on getting some normal breakfast food for once. No sirree, no cross-shaped pancakes for him. 

"But…but Quatre? Don't you want some? I made them myself and while you eat I can explain the story of Calvary to you. It'll be fun. I even made little croissant in the shape of the spears they used to pierce his side – it adds to the drama."

Quatre could have sworn he felt his eyebrow twitch.  "Heero…" he rubbed his temples and plopped down into a chair.  "I do not want any of your pancakes and I most certainly don't want to hear a story about a man being butchered to death while I eat.  Don't we have any cereal?"

Heero grinned and pulled down a box of cheerios.  He gladly poured a bowl for Quatre and watched over his shoulder as he ate.  It only took a moment for Quatre to get annoyed.  "What is it now?"

"Well," Heero took a seat next to his friend, "Ever noticed the little hole in the cheerios?"

Quatre eyed him warily and debated on whether or not to shove the bowl away.  "Uh… yeah?"

"There's a hole just like that in your heart, Quatre, and only God can fill it."

"GAAHH!!!"

Quatre shoved the bowl away. Surely he could find some food that wasn't symbolic of the child abuse his friend felt compelled to promote so badly. 

"No more cereal?" Heero grinned. "That's okay, I fixed some stone shaped sausage for you too. And some egg whites to represent the cloud that Jesus ascended in to!" 

"NO!" Quatre rose from the table. "I don't eat sausage, and I hate eggs! BACK OFF! I'm going to find Duo and see what he did to you. I want the old Heero back. The one who wasn't some sort of alien." 

That said, Quatre stormed out of the kitchen off to find Duo, who by chance was just on his way inside.  "Hey, Quatre!  I just went to the video store!  Heero and I are going to watch the entire Bible Man series after breakfast!  Want to join us?"

That was it.  He was SURE that his eyebrow was twitching now.  Without saying a word, he grabbed Duo by the braid, causing the poor man to drop his videos all over the floor as the blonde man dragged him into his study and slammed the door.  With a fire in his eyes that looked the same as when he was on the Zero system, he growled in a low voice.  "What have you done to Heero?"

"I didn't do anything I swear. God works in mysterious ways. He read the Book and now he's changed. It's not a bad thing, Quatre. Maybe you could use a healthy dose of it too. Geez, you're so hostile. What crawled up your butt and died?"

Quatre threw his arms up in the air and collapsed to the floor, burying his face in his hands.  "I can't take this anymore??  Everything I've ever known to be true is changing!  Even now the God of Death is watching Bible Man and The Perfect Soldier, Mr. Sadistic himself is making cross-shaped pancakes!!"

Duo raised an eyebrow.  "Cross-shaped pancakes?  Why hadn't I thought of that?"

Quatre just let out a frustrated scream.  "That's it!  Either I've gone insane or the rest of the world has!!!"

Duo rolled his eyes at his friend and leaned over hauling him up from the floor, then pushing him onto the couch. "There's no need to be so melodramatic. Just think of it like this, Heero has found something to make him feel complete. You know that he's happier than he's been in ages. Who are you to want to take that away." 

Quatre paused for a moment, seeming to actually think about what Duo just said.  It made sense.  If it made Heero happy, then it must be a good thing, right?  Anything that could make Heero wear a smile was definitely no small matter.  "Well," he sighed, "I guess you're right.  If Heero is happy, then so am I."

Duo grinned.  "Great!  So do you want to hear more about just what makes Heero happy or not really?"

"Not now, Duo.  But maybe later.  First let me adjust to Happy-Heero.  That in itself is going to be a huge change."

Duo nodded.  "Yeah, but no more death threats, huh?"

"Fine, for now." Quatre sighed heavily, then rested his head in his hands. His head felt like someone had shoved a red-hot poker through his temple and was happily twisting it around in circles. 

"Great." Duo glanced at the door. "Please just try to be civil to him. I know you're a little distracted by it, but it's not so bad really. He'll simmer down in a few days, I promise." 

"You really think he will?"

Duo shrugged.  "I know from experience.  Remember those mysterious lollipops that you found all over the house that time?"

"You mean the ones with the paper clothes and colored yarn hair?"

"Yep!" Duo sighed, "The infamous Lollipop Jesus[1]!"

Quatre decided not to comment. He raised himself up then held his hands up in defeat. "Okay. I give up. No more death threats or snide remarks. I got it." 

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1 – The Lollipop Jesus is our dear friend, made from a blowpop and whatever else we could come up with.  Lots of fun.  ^^


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